Ladies, gentlemen, and everything in between — your saviour has returned from the dead.
Yes. Me. Back again.
Did you seriously think I was going to leave you? I almost did, not going to lie. But I couldn’t do it. You needed me. Or I needed you. Honestly it’s unclear.
Let’s get the ball rolling.
One day you might be on top of the world, and the very next day you will be sitting in a ditch looking up, wondering if you’d ever see the sun again.
And the very next day you’re on TOP OF THE WORLD AGAIN.
Almost a year ago I was in the same situation. A situation where your hero finds himself right now.
He had started his journey of infinite money and fame by creating the most prominent blog in the history of mankind — and he had already done the hard part of starting it. He just had to follow his heart and keep on going.
Then the very next week, he got sick and never wrote again. Not because he was bedridden or unable to. No.
Just because he was in love.
In love with the very thing that destroys his life — Procrastination.
And after breaking up with her, he came back a year later to start again. And again, she came to lay him down.
But not today, my love.
Today you need me. My subjects need me. So I have risen from the ashes and come to their aid.
Then I left you again, this time for love — not with procrastination, but a real awesome girl.
Well, who’s got a girl? This guy. We will get to this later.
I am Flat Broke Again
I had managed to do everything right for 2 weeks.
Sold my kidneys and repaid the mafia. Surprisingly, they were grateful.
Was learning, studying, and writing the greatest blog that nobody reads.
But everything went down the drain within 48 hours.
I got food poisoning and puked my heart out, was bedridden for a few days, lost a few pounds, and guilt ate me alive — and I ate my way back into debt.
I was even willing to sell my soul to the devil but he just kept haggling at the price, so that deal didn’t go through.
The only good thing here is the consistency — you have to give me credit.
I am always, literally, eating my way into debt.
From almost becoming zero to -6K, my net worth is still an estimate. So we can say proudly that the Finance Guru might need to just go into hiding for a few days.
Well, Some Miracles Do Happen
In the last 2 weeks I managed to complete Phase 1 of my study plan.
After a year of procrastination, I managed to put my mind in the right place and do the thing in 2 weeks. What’s not to love.
But here’s the catch — any idiot who writes that exam passes.
So technically this only proves that I am another common idiot. Hurray to me.
Turns out I am not the brightest, but I am also not the dumbest.
I am beautifully, gloriously average.
But your guru will accept it for now.
The real challenge begins right now.
I feel like a wise old teacher who always rage baits his students with a new challenge. Maybe old age has made me the very thing that I hated.
The Part I Didn’t Plan For
But this villain has gotten someone special, something to cheer for, something to look forward to, and someone to live for.
Didn’t expect that last line to have this much impact, but damn, that’s good.
Still don’t quite understand what she saw in me, but whatever it is — do you see me complaining?
This last month has been quite magical and surreal for this random guy.
Yes, one of the many things I decided for this year was that I was not going to go after a girl this year.
I just wanted to look into her eyes and say goodbye — but I couldn’t.
And for the first time in a long time, in the middle of the bustling traffic, I only heard her voice, I only saw her face — the light slowly lighting up her face, which had a red hue, and a lonely strand of hair dancing on it.
All those memories came back, of the moments shared, the times I wished somebody was there for me.
And I couldn’t help but ask the question that had bugged me for so long —
“Are you crazy enough to give me a chance?”
And she said nothing.
She just smiled.
And I understood what she meant.
And we held hands.
We said more in that silence than we ever could have in words.
And guys, that’s how I met your mother.
